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I Give Up

No Cast

Went back to the hospital this morning – no dice. They told me that I need to go back to the doctor and try to get an admission some other date. They also recommended trying surgery at a different hospital in another city. The main hospital apparently gets quite filled up with emergencies.

I won’t lie, I don’t get how all of that works. It makes no sense to my brain. But, nothing I can do about it.

I know from my first meeting with the doctor that he has one more surgery date this month – June 16th. However, I have no idea whether I’ll be able to get an appointment with him before that date. I also know that he won’t be operating during Ramadan – so nothing from about June 17th through July 18th.

We’re supposed to be heading out to Brazil about July 18th. A surgery date of June 16th would make that leave date impossible. A surgery date after Ramadan makes the trip to Brazil impossible. Mr. Lyndsy hasn’t been home in years and I know he’s really looking forward to it.

Everything about foot drop has been impossible to deal with. From the physical therapist making things worse, to holding off when the neurosurgeon said to wait, to the first doctor I saw here this year. At this point I just wonder if I’m just supposed to leave it as is and not try to have the surgery.

Then I think about how hard it would be to live without trying surgery. Driving hurts. Walking hurts. Surgery *might* make those better. Or it may not work at all.

All of this depresses me. A lot.

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