An Order of Resentment with a Side of Frustration, Please

30-day Project

Right from day 1 I’ve been feeling like I hate tracking my food. HATE it. Because I resent that I can’t eat whatever I want without looking like a hippo. I get frustrated trying to continuously have food I like to eat that without getting bored.

When I track with Weight Watchers I feel like I HAVE to eat a certain way – basically all fresh veggies with chicken and shrimp almost exclusively. I feel like the Plan Manager is judging me for my choices and that makes me want to tell it to go fuck itself. The app even tells me that the tracker is much happier when I tell it about my food. Creepy much?

For those who have never used Weight Watchers, here’s how it works. You record what you eat into the Plan Manager. It’s pretty helpful and already includes a lot of foods, including restaurant foods. The Plan Manager then converts the nutritional information into a point value. Based on your gender, weight, and goals, you have a certain number of points you can eat each day and you get 49 extra points to use over the course of the week. You weigh in once per week. Your daily point number is adjusted based on your weight.

They changed the system a while ago when they finally acknowledged that eating an apple isn’t the same as eating as 100 calorie snack pack, even though they both have the same calories. Now most fruits and veggies don’t cost you any points and as long as you don’t go apeshit on them, you’ll still lose weight.

The whole point of Weight Watchers isn’t to force you into a particular way of eating. It’s really about helping you make choices about what you’re eating so you can see, quickly and easily, the cost of the food you do eat. They give you extra points so you can indulge from time to time. It’s an algorithm to make eating in moderation easier.

I finally realized this weekend that I was missing the point. This isn’t a race to some finish. It’s more about being able to see the big picture of the food I eat and figuring out how to make things balance. Sure, I can have a burger and fries for lunch, but I probably need to have a salad for dinner that night and I shouldn’t really have that burger and fries too many times during the week.

 I also decided that for a week or so I’d eat the way I always do to see what it looks like and get a feel for why I was turning into a blimp.

So yesterday I indulged a gross amount at the mall. The fact that I felt like crap for overeating and eating stuff that’s not great for me probably should have been enough of an indicator that it wasn’t a great way to eat. But seeing how I used up all my daily points and then almost all of my weekly points really hammered it home. (Fortunately it was the end of the week so I get all my weekly points back today!)

Anyway, I’m a lot calmer now. No need to tell website where it can take itself.