Fatigue is a TOTAL DRAG

I know I’ve mentioned before that fatigue is one of the symptoms of fibromyalgia, diabetes, thyroid issues, lupus, etc. Since my thyroid and diabetes are under control, I suspect it’s not them. It could be the lupus. But the most likely culprit for the cause of the fatigue is fibro.

I don’t know what’s going on, but the last few weeks have been *really* bad. I downloaded and app for the AppleWatch that tracks your sleep for you. I figured that I’d have some issues since I know I don’t sleep particularly well – I wake up a lot, I toss and turn (can’t figure out why), but I didn’t expect that it would be this bad.

From the output, my deep sleep ranges anywhere from NO DEEP SLEEP to no more than 45-50 minutes usually. Most people need/get 2 hours of deep sleep.

This wouldn’t be a problem except that deep sleep is the restorative sleep. This is the time your body takes to heal itself. Because my body isn’t really getting a chance to do that, I’m constantly fatigued. I have pain. My brain is sluggish.

I tried using binaural beats to help induce delta waves, but that had limited results. It doesn’t help that right now I’m at a hotel with a crappy bed that’s way too small for me and Mr. Lyndsy to share it comfortably. Perhaps when I’m back in my bed and I have space, the binaural beats will have more of an effect. I hope so anyway.

When I’m back with my own doctors I will definitely be chatting with them about this. I’m sure (read: I hope) they’re all familiar with the necessity of deep sleep. I have no idea what the plan may be to correct it though. I’m not sure that my shrink will want to prescribe any kind of sleep medication since I’m already on an anti-depressant that’s supposed to be addressing it. I’m not also not sure that’s the correct solution since I do fall asleep and I can stay that way for 8 hours. (I think that’s a side effect of exercising 6 days/week.)

I am desperate to find a solution because I’m pretty sure at some point the body just shuts down when it’s not getting the time it needs to heal. At this point I can’t afford to have any more health issues. I have enough trouble managing the ones I have!

This is something I was thinking about the other day. Currently I work part-time from home, but at the point we move back to the United States (if we do), I may have to go back to work full-time outside the home. Right now I don’t think my body could do it. These days I’m not really taxing my body and mind the way working full-time does. Sitting at a desk for hour after hour while typing causes an immense amount of pain in my upper back and arms as well as my lower back. Additional pain will only exacerbate the brain fog.

I have a friend who has been going through the Social Security Disability process. Her doctor said something that has started to resonate with me: Her main job is to manage her illnesses.

At the time she shared that I didn’t understand what that meant. Now I have a better idea. I work out which keeps my body pretty stable and I sleep better when I work out (which isn’t saying much, apparently). I rest when I need to so that my body doesn’t collapse on me. I eat better, which is probably helping my body – giving it more energy for the workouts which are helping me sleep better.

But until I get all, or as many as possible, of my health issues worked out, working more isn’t a possibility. My focus right now HAS to be on getting things under control. They just aren’t right now. I’m working on it, but I’m not there yet.

And that’s okay. These are BIG issues for me. They take time to resolve. There’s just no way around that. Organs are being affected. My musculoskeletal system is involved. My brain is a little fried right now.

So right now, my priority is my body (or, as it is now known, My Preciousss). Once I get my body better sorted, I think many other things will follow.

State of the Marital Union: The Exception to the Rule

Well, yesterday was our wedding anniversary. I have to say, I have no idea how 3 years has gone by so quickly.

The thing that remains true is that our marriage is easy. Life has thrown us some curve balls, but throughout all of it, our marriage has been fantastic. Our relationship has been so stress-free. We’ve had ONE really tense situation, and that was just because we hadn’t communicated well enough regarding a couple situations. We resolved it quickly too.

We were on our way to dinner with my mom and a close family friend (who’s like a mom to me) and they both talked about how marriage isn’t that easy. Again, it was pointed out how we are the exception to the rule.

I still find this amusing since I’m not sure what we do so differently than others that makes us the exception. I guess we’re just lucky.

We had lunch at The Melting Pot, which is a favorite of ours. At least we know which of the 7 Deadly Sins is likely to be my downfall. Yum, delicious GLUTTONY!

I hope we continue being the happy exception to the rule. I need the stability he provides in my life. He continues to tell me that I do something for him, though I have yet to figure out what exactly, LOL.